Q: " I don't understand what I'm doing
wrong! I've got my lines down straight and I'm pretty sure
I know how to flirt right. So how come my room mate seems
to be doing so much better than me. I've heard the crap he
tells some of the girls who fall for it. I use the same cheesy
pick up lines as well. So how come they work for him but not
for me? Is there some flirting secret out there that I don't
know about or something? I suppose the only thing I've noticed
that's different is that he seems to like to touch them a
lot (I've never figured out how he gets away with it) and
the girl is already looking his way before he even goes over
to speak to her. How does he make meeting women look so simple?
"
A: " If what you say is true then
it sounds like the guy is using a new technique of flirting
also known as non verbal flirting. Combined together with
the usual flirting techniques, you can really have a woman
eating out of the palm of your hand. The reason why this flirting
technique is so successful is because unlike the spoken word,
your body can signal invitation, acceptance or refusal without
being too obvious, without causing offence or making binding
commitments. The following flirting secret is how non verbal
flirting is done.
Use your eyes – Your eyes are actually a
great way of flirting with a girl. Get her attention by getting
her to look you in her eye, and hold her gaze. And
when her attention is on you, give her a playful smile or
wink before you head over . You would already have
scored points before ever saying a word. Don't just make eye
contact when you're across the room though. Remember, the
flirting secret is to keep trying to make eye contact with
her while picking her up at the same time.
The only mistake you can make here is if you overdo the eye contact in a premature attempt to increase intimacy. This may make the girl feel uncomfortable, and may send misleading signals instead so know when enough is enough.
How is your Posture – Your posture is also
extremely important when flirting. Body language speaks volumes
and is one of the biggest secrets to many successful flirting
techniques. You may be smiling and laughing but if
your body is acting tensed up you will give yourself away
. It's also known as non-verbal leakage because while
we're controlling our faces and what we say, our real feelings
about the matter sometimes leak out in our postures.
Gestures - As well as overall body posture,
the gestures we use when we flirt can signal interest, attraction
and invitation - or discomfort, dislike and rejection. The
flirting secret here is to be aware of these non-verbal cues.
Use them to read your partner's body language as well as control
the messages you are sending out with your own gestures when
meeting women.
When you're flirting, you can hold the woman's
interest by enhancing your speech with appropriate gestures:
shifting your hands or head slightly at the end of sentences,
using downward hand movements to emphasize a point, 'projecting'
what you are saying towards your partner by open-palm hand
movements and so on. When your partner is speaking, you can
show responsiveness by nodding in agreement, throwing up your
hands in surprise, bringing them together in a 'silent clap'
of appreciation, etc. All this is part of the secret technique
of non verbal flirting.
Touch – The final and most important part
of non verbal flirting is touch. Touch is extremely important
to women who enjoy being cared for, hugged and comforted.
When you're flirting with a woman you've just met you flirting
secrets you can use are fleeting touches on the arm, to draw
attention, express support or emphasize a point.
Most likely she will be turned on more than turned off by
you.
